Unchangable stories.

Sometimes when I hear of stories where I can’t change their plots, I wonder how fortunate I am to be in my own fairy-tale.

Things that I cannot change.

I can only stand by and bloody watch, then pray for him. Call myself a brother somemore.

I wanna help.

But I don’t have the capacity to.

And giving mere moral support seems so insincere.

But it’s the very least only thing I can do.

When I see you it pains me not to be able to help.

Sian.

俊男美女是配起來用的詞語.

Need help, call me.

Dahwei.

Empty space.

And I stared at the empty space, wondering where it had gone.

We had lost it. The same bastard that removed the slide bars and spiral stairs had really done it this time.

The big yellow slide was gone.

That which used to be our clubhouse, where I used to sit perched above the rest during our club gatherings, was now gone with the wind. Still remember the times when we used to cheer as one, sit together as one, flirt with each other and just be joyous and carefree. Chinese New Year, New Year’s Eve, Youth day, Christmas, when we sat together counting down.

The days were over.

The place where I used to sit and joke and watch all my other gang members crap while I zoned out into the distance. We all had our roles. I was their watchman, or so they appointed me. I would be responsible for guarding the slide, ensuring that there were always enough twigs and seeds to defend ourselves from whatever intangible enemy that we would conjure up.

It was those days that I was fearless and unafraid of pain, having fallen down countless of times from my guardpost 5m up from the ground. I had sprained my ankle, cut myself, bled and then luxuriated in the care showered upon me by the gang.

After that faithful incident which I broke one arm, I went missing in action for about 6 months. And when I returned hoping to be reunited with the gang — it had been disbanded. We had all grown out of our childish behaviour. Climbing up to the post, I sat there pondering where they had all gone.

We were never together again, as we parted out separate ways. But I still had that big yellow slide. The place where we would always be together as one.

But today, I stand upon the sand dumbstuck by the fact that the slide had been removed.

You might ask, what’s the big deal with a stupid slide like that?

My childhood memories are with it, mind you.

Just cause ONE whimpering kid went home complaining about how he fell from the slide and got bruised.
Just cause his parents are simply overprotective.
Just cause they bloody complained.

DOESNT MEAN YOU HAVE TO REMOVE MY ONLY FORM OF REMINISCENCE ABOUT THE OLD TIMES.

SHIT YOU.

I have fallen down more times than you can imagine. Then why remove the slide only now? And take away what’s so precious to me?

I broke my arm cause your bloody playground was uneven, but did my parents complain? If they had, you would have to spend tons of your filthy cash to go level the ground, which you obviously wouldn’t.

And when I ask you nicely in the face, you better show me more respect. You have no creativity in your excuses. For the safety of the children? Please don’t talk rubbish.

It’s cause that day was the start of my exams. That’s why I never argued with you. And I already warned you in the face.

The next time I see you, you pompous bastard, I’m gonna tear your guts out. You don’t wanna mess with me, cause you’ll regret it. I’ll grab your bloody neck and smash your face into the sand. I dare you to remove another item from the playground. Then I will make sure you remember who you’re messing with.

Last time when I was a kid, and the gang was still around, you didn’t dare to come near us. We always called you the pig. But now? When we are all grown up and there’s only me left? You wanna try me?

You bloody site-constructor. I don’t give a damn whether you’re 3x fatter than me. I can still win you in unarmed combat anyhow.

I’m telling you, you better don’t piss me off. I guard what I treasure.

You don’t know how huge a chunk you’ve torn out of me.

That iconic slide which used to bond us.

Now that it’s gone, what’s left of the gang would only be

the shards of memories

which remain in that secluded corner of our minds.

—————–

zzz

Felt damn sian that night when I sat on the swings staring at the empty spot and suddenly the piercing feeling of nostalgia started to overwhelm me. It’s almost as though I could visualise ourselves running all over the place again and climbing over the slide like monkeys sia. Seriously damn spooky but just imagine – images of us kids, young once again, scampering around like idiots and being totally childish. Haha.

Sweetness.

Nostalgia seriously damn painful. Walao eh the feeling of something so true to your heart being suddenly removed liddat. Shitless.

Dahwei.